helo chat i come to bring you r/eddit ahh post to ask if i'm stupid or not ty>be me, tism tranner with daddy mommy issues what not
>end up in this abusive relationship, lasts over a year and turns out that it was a sex cult where even my closest friends were part of
>it all implodes right after i lose my job and come out to my conserv family
>fucking hell, go into mega depresso mode
>mutual friend of me and my abuser notices what was going on, backstabs them, and we basically fuck over my abuser and try to rush her to a hospital nearby (failed)
>was basically about to kill myself, couldn't do anything and just felt everything was my fault
>be saved last second by this friend, takes me into this like 4 hour chat
>a day later she asks me out, she says she had been crushing on me for a while and what not
>eh fuck it why not i kinda like her too
>she treats me like an actual human being for once in my life, helps me with getting help and guides me on
>fix a lot of my life, although it was more of a work in progress that had to take time
>loved her with all my being, she also did. it really was the best relationship i ever had
>it all comes down as i had a series of episodes where i tried to kill myself and basically panicked her more than i had ever done up to that point
>mess up a bunch of things, cause a bunch of stress on her by accident
>she tells me to fuck off, cuts all ties with me and leaves me right before christmas
>try to kill myself on new years, parents noticed and get rushed to hospital
>live, but still depressed as fuck
>all that work i was doing before this finally pays off, my life improves by a million
>still hard to live without her but can't drop the ball right now, my family and coworkers depend on me
>cont.