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My abject position in life is born from a complete and barricading avoidance and nigh terror of difficulty, confrontation, complexity and I deny this reality by the response of conceiving of a hyper-mechanistic and self-diagnosing conjecture that frames the issue as none of my mistake but merely the granular clockwork of an invisible and sublimely antagonistic force that has brought me to this deficiency. I've managed to delude myself into thinking that I temporarily disoriented and I've